After talking with KA ealier tonight, I've realized something: Things have changed. In the last month, I've been visiting a psychologist to improve many things in my life. so far, I've succeeded with work. I'm way more productive than I have ever been. And lately, I felt like I was about to succeed in restoring the broken trust between Kirby Oak and I. But something stuck me: he changed. I'm not talking about his friendship with FD or his college life, but something more fundamental. I've always seen him as someone I could always speak with, no matter the time of the day. And I still saw him online all the time, so I kept that vision of him. But... it is wrong. He might be online, but he made a choice, the choice to, not only be best friend with FD, but to involve himself in activities requiring 100% of his focus, instead of multitasking like he did when he was best friend with me. In that regard, Kirby is not the person I thought could always be there, not anymore. Even if he wanted to do stuff with me, his life is already filled with a lot of commitments and those go first. Like mostly everyone else I know online, he now has a life (read as "having a filled agenda that cannot be moved around", not "having a life outside the computer").
In that context, trying to be friends with him would seem impossible, wouldn't it? How could I be friend with someone with so little time to give to people who aren't his best friend? But, I think that's the point of what I've realized today. My good friend on the Internet, Rougia, is not often available either. She has only two days in the week she doesn't work; the rest of the days, she works at night and sleep right before it and I'm mostly unavailable while I'm work. To make a short story, we probably have 1-2 good occasions every week to truly do things together; the rest of the time we talk, it's kept short. Yet, I consider us to be friends. Contradictory, isn't it? On one hand, I almost instinctively consider Kirby not to be a friend because he is busy and on the other hand, someone who can rarely play with me is considered a friend. I've thought about it in my bed last night, and the answer seemed so simple I almost feel stupid for not thinking about it: It's all a matter of perspective. With Rougia, I have known from the day 1 that she wasn't often available and I've accepted it as being a part of our friendship. With Kirby, I've become used to him always being online and it's hard for me to accept anything less than that.
But... things do change. It's an unavoidable fact of life. I'm the first one to have changed, most ironically. The days I could stay up late and play all night are a thing of the past. Now, I have to go sleep early to have enough energy to go through a whole day while staying mentally productive and creative. On weekends, I have certain tasks to accomplish, because I don't have time to on weekdays. On the top of all that, there are a lot of daily things, such as eating and keeping myself clean, that have to be done. Kirby seek someone friendly he could spend his online time with... and unfortunately, I cannot really fill that role. Friendly, I think I can be now. Available? Nope, that I can't. So I think... that even if FD wasn't around, that Kirb wouldn't find that kind of solution in me. Not someone with a busy life like me. It comes with a price, though. Someone else filled that role and together, they have chosen activities preventing anyone else from even thinking about getting close with any of these two.
In light of all this, is Kirby Oak still my friend: Yes. Not a terrific friend. Not a close friend, not even a real friend, but a friend nonetheless. Because, beyond the facts that we both got a life now, we still have a few shared interests. So long I am nice and go on with my life when things aren't all perfect, I think we can be good friends. I've been wrong all that time. Friendship isn't counted in minutes spent together, in number of RP played or any other superficial parameter. Friendship is about feeling comfortable around another person. I feel comfortable around Rou, around FD, around KA and around Kirby. Those are all my friends. My time with them might be limited... but I wouldn't want it gone for all the money in the world. What makes 10 minutes in a day so wonderful... that's what friendship is. If anyone in the Skype group is reading this... I want to be back home, guys.
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Friday, October 23, 2009
Lone week, productive week
Hello everyone.
Tonight is the end of another long week of work, but unlike all the other weeks so far, my manager wasn't there at all. I was alone to do everything I had to do. I thought at first that it would have been too hard, but I did a lot better than expected. This said, this week was also one of change, so it hadn't have the most productive one in every aspect. However, considering that I was alone and that I can't be perfect immediately, I think I've reached a positive and encouraging level of achievement. I've also received my Halloween costume, which, I must admit, kind of seem to be rushed at some places. I guess that's a fair consequence of asking for express delivery. It's good enough for its purpose. I'm a bit disappointed that the ears aren't removable, because the hoodie is very stylish and certainly could be wore on some other days that aren't Halloween. Hopefully, maybe Gramma or mom will find a way to fix that in a few months. For now, I will focus on next week. There's that party Friday, but also work to be done. I will also look for a new laptop tomorrow. It's probably going to be nice. I'm sure. Either way, I blame Jen, as usual. I think I said everything for tonight, so Ciao!
----
Salut tout le monde.
Ce soir est la fin d'une autre longue semaine de travail, mais au contraire de toutes les autres semaines jusqu'à présent, mon boss n'était pas là du tout. J'étais tout seul pour faire toute la job. J'ai pensé que ça serait trop difficile, mais finalement, cela à été assez facile et une bonne expérience de vie. Cette semaine a aussi été une semaine de changement, donc ça n'à pas aider à faire de cette semaine la plus productive qui soit. Par contre, puisque j'étais seul et que je ne peux pas être parfait, je crois avoir atteint un bon niveau de positivisme et d'accomplissments. J'ai aussi reçu mon costume d'Halloween, qui, je doit l'avouer, semble un peu botché a certains endroits. Je suppose que c'est une conséquence correcte du fait que j'ai vraiment poussé pour une livraison expresse. On sème ce que l'on récolte. Le costume est assez correct pour ce que je vais en faire. En passant, je suis un peu désapointé que les oreilles peuvent pas être enlevé, parce que le jacket est vraiment cool et pourrait certainement être porté lors de d'autre jours que l'Halloween. Peut-être que grand-moman ou moman pourrait le changer dans quelque mois. Pour l'instant, je vais focuser sur la prochaine semaine. Il y a un party vendredi et du travail doit être fait. Je vais aussi regarder pour un nouveau laptop demain. Ca va etre le fun, je suis sur. Peut-importe, je blame Jen, comme d'habitude. Je crois que j'ai tout dis pour ce soir, alors Ciao!
Tonight is the end of another long week of work, but unlike all the other weeks so far, my manager wasn't there at all. I was alone to do everything I had to do. I thought at first that it would have been too hard, but I did a lot better than expected. This said, this week was also one of change, so it hadn't have the most productive one in every aspect. However, considering that I was alone and that I can't be perfect immediately, I think I've reached a positive and encouraging level of achievement. I've also received my Halloween costume, which, I must admit, kind of seem to be rushed at some places. I guess that's a fair consequence of asking for express delivery. It's good enough for its purpose. I'm a bit disappointed that the ears aren't removable, because the hoodie is very stylish and certainly could be wore on some other days that aren't Halloween. Hopefully, maybe Gramma or mom will find a way to fix that in a few months. For now, I will focus on next week. There's that party Friday, but also work to be done. I will also look for a new laptop tomorrow. It's probably going to be nice. I'm sure. Either way, I blame Jen, as usual. I think I said everything for tonight, so Ciao!
----
Salut tout le monde.
Ce soir est la fin d'une autre longue semaine de travail, mais au contraire de toutes les autres semaines jusqu'à présent, mon boss n'était pas là du tout. J'étais tout seul pour faire toute la job. J'ai pensé que ça serait trop difficile, mais finalement, cela à été assez facile et une bonne expérience de vie. Cette semaine a aussi été une semaine de changement, donc ça n'à pas aider à faire de cette semaine la plus productive qui soit. Par contre, puisque j'étais seul et que je ne peux pas être parfait, je crois avoir atteint un bon niveau de positivisme et d'accomplissments. J'ai aussi reçu mon costume d'Halloween, qui, je doit l'avouer, semble un peu botché a certains endroits. Je suppose que c'est une conséquence correcte du fait que j'ai vraiment poussé pour une livraison expresse. On sème ce que l'on récolte. Le costume est assez correct pour ce que je vais en faire. En passant, je suis un peu désapointé que les oreilles peuvent pas être enlevé, parce que le jacket est vraiment cool et pourrait certainement être porté lors de d'autre jours que l'Halloween. Peut-être que grand-moman ou moman pourrait le changer dans quelque mois. Pour l'instant, je vais focuser sur la prochaine semaine. Il y a un party vendredi et du travail doit être fait. Je vais aussi regarder pour un nouveau laptop demain. Ca va etre le fun, je suis sur. Peut-importe, je blame Jen, comme d'habitude. Je crois que j'ai tout dis pour ce soir, alors Ciao!
Thursday, October 22, 2009
UMBRE!!!
Um umbre umbreon umbre umbreon. Breon! (Translation: I think the image says everything. Ciao! / Je crois que l'image dit tout. Ciao!)
The return of the random morning post
Sparktail: *shows the scenes of yesterday's episode where he threatened to transform me into something to be mean* Hello. Since nobody expressed their opinion, I will choose mine over the opinion of everyone else! *cruel laugh*
He scares when he is all villain-like. *shudder*
Sparktail: *sets the TF gun* Since you are going to receive your Halloween costume and I think it's a bit childish to diguise at your age, I'm going to make you a chibi-umbreon. Hehehe! *shoots*
*turned into an eevee-sized umbreon* Hey! That's my favorite transformation! You don't have right to... Wait... I'm a chibi umbreon *wag tail* Yay! I'm awesome! *run all around the nest and Sparktail excitingly* Weee!
Sparktail: *pouts* He wasn't supposed to like it... Damn... Meh, I guess I will go back annoying Sa- I mean, Kai. Those two are too similar, itheys confusing. *shakes his head and walks away*
*still running around childishly* Ciao!
----
Sparktail: *montre la scene du dernier épisode où il a menacé de me transformer en quelque chose pour le fun.* Salut. Puisque personne a voté, je vais décider moi-même de la transformation pis ignorer l'opinion du monde enter *rire maléfique*
Il me fais quasiment peur quand il essaye d'être maléfique. *tremble*
Sparktail: *règle le TF gun* Puisque que tu as reçu ton costume d'Halloween pis que je trouve que c'est bébé de ce déguiser en Pokemon à ton âge, je vais te transformer en bébé umbreon. Héhéhé! *tire sur moi*
*transformé en bébé umbreon* Hé! C'est ma transformation favorite! T'à pas le droit de me la vol-- attend une minute... je suis un bébé umbreon! *bouge ma queue rapidement* Yay! Je suis cool! *cours autour de Sparktail avec entrain* Weeee!!!
Sparktail: *fait la baboune* Il était pas supposé d'aimer ça... calisse... Bah... je suppose que je vais retourner achaler Sa.. oh, je veux dire, Kai. Ces deux là se ressemblent trop. *part*
*Encore en train de courir partout comme un enfant* Ciao!
He scares when he is all villain-like. *shudder*
Sparktail: *sets the TF gun* Since you are going to receive your Halloween costume and I think it's a bit childish to diguise at your age, I'm going to make you a chibi-umbreon. Hehehe! *shoots*
*turned into an eevee-sized umbreon* Hey! That's my favorite transformation! You don't have right to... Wait... I'm a chibi umbreon *wag tail* Yay! I'm awesome! *run all around the nest and Sparktail excitingly* Weee!
Sparktail: *pouts* He wasn't supposed to like it... Damn... Meh, I guess I will go back annoying Sa- I mean, Kai. Those two are too similar, itheys confusing. *shakes his head and walks away*
*still running around childishly* Ciao!
----
Sparktail: *montre la scene du dernier épisode où il a menacé de me transformer en quelque chose pour le fun.* Salut. Puisque personne a voté, je vais décider moi-même de la transformation pis ignorer l'opinion du monde enter *rire maléfique*
Il me fais quasiment peur quand il essaye d'être maléfique. *tremble*
Sparktail: *règle le TF gun* Puisque que tu as reçu ton costume d'Halloween pis que je trouve que c'est bébé de ce déguiser en Pokemon à ton âge, je vais te transformer en bébé umbreon. Héhéhé! *tire sur moi*
*transformé en bébé umbreon* Hé! C'est ma transformation favorite! T'à pas le droit de me la vol-- attend une minute... je suis un bébé umbreon! *bouge ma queue rapidement* Yay! Je suis cool! *cours autour de Sparktail avec entrain* Weeee!!!
Sparktail: *fait la baboune* Il était pas supposé d'aimer ça... calisse... Bah... je suppose que je vais retourner achaler Sa.. oh, je veux dire, Kai. Ces deux là se ressemblent trop. *part*
*Encore en train de courir partout comme un enfant* Ciao!
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Random morning post
Sparktail: *walks in, holding the TF gun* Hello, DPL friends and readers and family. Don't mind me, I'm not about to use the TF gun to transform DPL into something something for the heck of it.
*roll my eyes* Don't you have anything better to do? If it's about the fact we live in a burrow at shrunken size, then it has been 4 weeks now! Get over it!
Sparktail: Oh, I plan to, but I won't give, I will take. I'm taking over this place! As for you, you will be shrunk and given to Paige as a toy.
What? You can't do that! Paige doesn't like being dominant! It will make her uncomfortable!
Sparktail: Exactly. Or I could make you a girl to embarrass you two, or I could make you an eevee so you would be her pet or maybe mix them up! Hehe. What to choose? Hmm... I know! I will ask your previous readers for their opinion! *look at the "screen"* To choose the transformation to force on DPL by leaving your answer in a comment. If no comment is received by tomorrow morning, I will choose a random one.
TO BE CONTINUED...
----
Sparktail (un pikachu): *marche vers moi* Salut DPL, amis, lecteurs et sa famille. Faite pas attention a moi, je ne suis certainement a veille d'utiliser mon pistolet de ransformation (TF gun) sur DPL juste parce que ca me tente. *sourire malefique*
*roulement de yeux* T`a vraiment rien de mieux a faire de ton temps? Si c'est a propos du fait que je nous ait retrecit et enfermer dans un nid souterrain, ben essaye un peu de passer par dessus! Ca fait 4 semaines qu'on ait ici!
Sparktail: C'est exactement ce que je vais faire. Je pense que je vais te retrecir et te donner a Paige comme jouet.
Woah! Tu peux pas faire ca! Qui va proteger le nid? Pis de toute facon, Paige aime pas etre dominante et elle va etre incomfortable!
Sparktail: Exactement pourquoi je fais ca. Ou je pourrais year transformer en fille et vous embarraser tout les deux. Ou te transformer en eevee et te donner a Paige comme animal de compagnie! Hmm... Tellement de tortures possible. Donne moi un moment pour y reflechir...
A SUIVRE...
*roll my eyes* Don't you have anything better to do? If it's about the fact we live in a burrow at shrunken size, then it has been 4 weeks now! Get over it!
Sparktail: Oh, I plan to, but I won't give, I will take. I'm taking over this place! As for you, you will be shrunk and given to Paige as a toy.
What? You can't do that! Paige doesn't like being dominant! It will make her uncomfortable!
Sparktail: Exactly. Or I could make you a girl to embarrass you two, or I could make you an eevee so you would be her pet or maybe mix them up! Hehe. What to choose? Hmm... I know! I will ask your previous readers for their opinion! *look at the "screen"* To choose the transformation to force on DPL by leaving your answer in a comment. If no comment is received by tomorrow morning, I will choose a random one.
TO BE CONTINUED...
----
Sparktail (un pikachu): *marche vers moi* Salut DPL, amis, lecteurs et sa famille. Faite pas attention a moi, je ne suis certainement a veille d'utiliser mon pistolet de ransformation (TF gun) sur DPL juste parce que ca me tente. *sourire malefique*
*roulement de yeux* T`a vraiment rien de mieux a faire de ton temps? Si c'est a propos du fait que je nous ait retrecit et enfermer dans un nid souterrain, ben essaye un peu de passer par dessus! Ca fait 4 semaines qu'on ait ici!
Sparktail: C'est exactement ce que je vais faire. Je pense que je vais te retrecir et te donner a Paige comme jouet.
Woah! Tu peux pas faire ca! Qui va proteger le nid? Pis de toute facon, Paige aime pas etre dominante et elle va etre incomfortable!
Sparktail: Exactement pourquoi je fais ca. Ou je pourrais year transformer en fille et vous embarraser tout les deux. Ou te transformer en eevee et te donner a Paige comme animal de compagnie! Hmm... Tellement de tortures possible. Donne moi un moment pour y reflechir...
A SUIVRE...
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Workaround
Hello everyone and lady.
Today was a second day of my new life filled with more nice things for me and eventually, a nicer me with everyone else. I've already seen positive effects out of it after two days. Yesterday was a bit slow to start off snaf not very productive at work, although more than Friday. I left work at 5 and had the time make myself a proper dinner, then to buy food, called my mom and went to sleep early. I would to note that I actually bought a vegetable at the grocery store. Next step is to eat it, but I already have a plan for that. Also, in order to go sleep in time, I read the summary of that episode I missed by going sleep early so I would get a bit of both. I'm proud of that too.
Now, today. Today was great. I had a slow start this morning, but this time, it only lasted 3 hours (I worked 1 hour overtime to compensate a bit) After that slow start though... Wow! Productivity went through the roof! I was given a task for the whole week ya see and I singlehandly finished it in one afternoon. I must have rolled an Exceptional Success at some point there. Heh. But the per extraordinary is that the custom Halloween costume I ordered has been finished this afternoon and is already in the mail! Yay! I may have it before weekend and have plenty of time to go get it at the post office, put it on and decide what kind of makeup I will add to make it more complete. I will look awesome at work next Friday, even if others decide they don't like it. I'm done living for others... Or trying to. It's hard to dro 15+ year old habits. Anyway, I sent an email to my boss explaining my successa and asking for more work.
Did I say today was great? Go DPL! Go! Ciao!
----
Workaround (Désolé, je ne connais pas la traduction de ce mot)
Salut tous le monde et mademoiselle!
Aujourd'hui, c'était la deuxième journée de ma nouvelle vie remplie de belles choses pour moi et, éventuallement, un moi plus gentil avec les autres. Les effets positifs ont déjà commencé a ce faire sentir après deux jours. La journée d'hier a été un peu plus lente et pas très productive au travail. mais c'était au moins mieux que vendredi. J'ai quitté la job a 5 heures, donc j'ai eu le temps de me faire un vrai souper, d'acheter de la bouffe, d'appeler moman et de me coucher de bonne heure. J'aimerais ajouter que j'ai acheté un légume, ce qui est une première pour moi. La prochaine étape est de manger le dit légume, mais j'ai aussi un plan pour cela. Ah, aussi, pour pouvoir me coucher de bonne heure, j'ai lu un résumé de l'épisode que j'ai du manquer pour me coucher tot, donc j'ai fais un compromis. Je suis fier de ca, aussi.
Maintenant, parlons de aujourd'hui. Aujourd'hui a été super cool. Encore un matin un peu slow, mais ca a seulement duré 3 heures. Après ca, par contre... wow! J'ai mis la pédale au plancher sur la productivité, comme jamais auparavant. Vous voyez, mon boss est pas là de la semaine, alors il m'à donné une tache qui devait prendre toute la semaine, mais tout fini cet après-midi. J'ai problablment du rouler un Success Incroyable a quelque moment dans la journée (essayez pas de comprendre, c'est une référence de WoD). Pour couronner le tout, mon costume d'Halloween est prêt et dans la malle au moment d'écrire ces lignes! Yay! je devrait le recevoir avant la fin de la semaine et avoir assez de temps pour le completer avec du maquillage et être prêt pour vendredi prochain. Ça va être cool, même si les autres décident qu'ils aiment pas. J'ai fini de vivre seulement pour faire plaisir aux autres. Je voulais CE costume et JE vais avoir le costume. Oh, pour finir, j'ai envoyé un email au boss pour expliquer mon succès et demander plus de job.
Oh, es-ce que j'ai dit que aujourd'hui était cool? Go DPL! Go! Ciao!
Today was a second day of my new life filled with more nice things for me and eventually, a nicer me with everyone else. I've already seen positive effects out of it after two days. Yesterday was a bit slow to start off snaf not very productive at work, although more than Friday. I left work at 5 and had the time make myself a proper dinner, then to buy food, called my mom and went to sleep early. I would to note that I actually bought a vegetable at the grocery store. Next step is to eat it, but I already have a plan for that. Also, in order to go sleep in time, I read the summary of that episode I missed by going sleep early so I would get a bit of both. I'm proud of that too.
Now, today. Today was great. I had a slow start this morning, but this time, it only lasted 3 hours (I worked 1 hour overtime to compensate a bit) After that slow start though... Wow! Productivity went through the roof! I was given a task for the whole week ya see and I singlehandly finished it in one afternoon. I must have rolled an Exceptional Success at some point there. Heh. But the per extraordinary is that the custom Halloween costume I ordered has been finished this afternoon and is already in the mail! Yay! I may have it before weekend and have plenty of time to go get it at the post office, put it on and decide what kind of makeup I will add to make it more complete. I will look awesome at work next Friday, even if others decide they don't like it. I'm done living for others... Or trying to. It's hard to dro 15+ year old habits. Anyway, I sent an email to my boss explaining my successa and asking for more work.
Did I say today was great? Go DPL! Go! Ciao!
----
Workaround (Désolé, je ne connais pas la traduction de ce mot)
Salut tous le monde et mademoiselle!
Aujourd'hui, c'était la deuxième journée de ma nouvelle vie remplie de belles choses pour moi et, éventuallement, un moi plus gentil avec les autres. Les effets positifs ont déjà commencé a ce faire sentir après deux jours. La journée d'hier a été un peu plus lente et pas très productive au travail. mais c'était au moins mieux que vendredi. J'ai quitté la job a 5 heures, donc j'ai eu le temps de me faire un vrai souper, d'acheter de la bouffe, d'appeler moman et de me coucher de bonne heure. J'aimerais ajouter que j'ai acheté un légume, ce qui est une première pour moi. La prochaine étape est de manger le dit légume, mais j'ai aussi un plan pour cela. Ah, aussi, pour pouvoir me coucher de bonne heure, j'ai lu un résumé de l'épisode que j'ai du manquer pour me coucher tot, donc j'ai fais un compromis. Je suis fier de ca, aussi.
Maintenant, parlons de aujourd'hui. Aujourd'hui a été super cool. Encore un matin un peu slow, mais ca a seulement duré 3 heures. Après ca, par contre... wow! J'ai mis la pédale au plancher sur la productivité, comme jamais auparavant. Vous voyez, mon boss est pas là de la semaine, alors il m'à donné une tache qui devait prendre toute la semaine, mais tout fini cet après-midi. J'ai problablment du rouler un Success Incroyable a quelque moment dans la journée (essayez pas de comprendre, c'est une référence de WoD). Pour couronner le tout, mon costume d'Halloween est prêt et dans la malle au moment d'écrire ces lignes! Yay! je devrait le recevoir avant la fin de la semaine et avoir assez de temps pour le completer avec du maquillage et être prêt pour vendredi prochain. Ça va être cool, même si les autres décident qu'ils aiment pas. J'ai fini de vivre seulement pour faire plaisir aux autres. Je voulais CE costume et JE vais avoir le costume. Oh, pour finir, j'ai envoyé un email au boss pour expliquer mon succès et demander plus de job.
Oh, es-ce que j'ai dit que aujourd'hui était cool? Go DPL! Go! Ciao!
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